Creating Me

I watched more delusional people last night... FYI... putting your hand on your ear as if you will find the pitch better that way, is adding insult to injury...

NeXt----->

Creativity abounds in me... known that from the start of my life. I create with out effort, it just comes to me. I never have to really think about a poem or a manuscript, the ideas and words just kinda show up in my head and I just have to make sure I have a pen and paper availiable to write it down, or I'll lose it.

I used to be afraid of showing my work to people, used to pretend I didn't do it at all. I would hide my notebooks when I had guests, use passwords on my laptop/cpu so they couldn't accidently open files, used to mark "DO NOT TOUCH" on boxs that held my work in the attic. All becuse I was afraid of what people would think if they knew.

In the beginning of high school, few people knew about the writing skills, until my 9th grade English teacher, read my first paper of the year. All of a sudden there was a meeting with my parents and the English staff at the school. I moved up in English levels the next week. When I got there, they wanted to move me up after a month, but I begged them not to. I pleaded with the staff because I was already seen as a nerd of sorts, because all of my classes had maybe 3 black kids in them. When the ratio was that low it meant that you were at a higher level than everyone else. I hated it! But it afforded me the opportunity to learn new skills as far as word usage and themes. And the I made sme friends for life. Black kids called me a sell-out, and white kids liked having at least one black friend...

This year my new creative venture is painting. I've dabbled off and on for years. My mother has a painting I did in high school, using pastels, up in her bedroom. I laugh when I see it, because I remember not wanting to do the assignment in the first place. I waited until the last day to do it. And that's what came out. Once it was out and on canvas, my teacher decided she hadn't been pushing me hard enough to create. So she hounded me from that day on to do more, paint more, draw more. And I did. Never signed my real name to it when it was on display at school. Had people wondering who the new girl that painted that was. My little secret and my little joke. But this year I feel it. I feel the need to express in colors. I see words in pictures as is, why not paint what I see when I hear them.

My second venture is music. I'm in love with music, as far as creating music, just dabbled in it. I played violin for 7/8 years. Played piano for a few months. Tried trumpet for a few months. Me and the piano have a special relationship. If I hear a song long enough, I can play the basic melody on the piano. Don't know how or why, but I like it. I have an electric guitar too. I can play the drums, my dad had an old set in the garage so I taught my self some stuff. So I'm a one-woman band huh....lol... but I have music in my head that needs to come out...

Gonna do some performing as well, SpokemWord stuff. Been hiding that since I've been back here in NY. Gotta share that....

My creativity is on the rise...