Monday Morning

Well well well, another Monday. The day is beautiful, nice temp, sun is shining. I can dig it!
I'm wearing a pink dress shirt and khaki's. Waiting for my bagel w/vege cream cheese to arrive. I'm in a pretty good mood. Got some Jesus this weekend. Cleaned my house and chilled. Ok basically I played video games all weekend and kept my cousin awake while she worked like 32hrs in three days.

I was reading a friend's blog and she said she knows somebody that doesnt like or intend on working. Hey thats me to a point. I f i didnt have to work at my job I wouldnt. If I had the opportunity to work on what I wanted when I wanted and still be productive I would. If I had a million dollars I could make it last for a very long time to where I wouldnt hae to work. This 9-5 Biz isnt me. I hate it. I wish i could just work when I wanted. Thats why I pray this enetrtainment company works. I need a job where i walk in the door and i dont feel like I'm working. I want to do the things I enjoy! Why cant it be that easy? I write somebody a biz plan, they say make it work, and give me the freedom try my hand at it? I wish.. but at the same time I'm making it happen slowly but surely!

Runaway Bride.... I have someone that I love dearly that is about to make a mistake, only thing is I cant stop her. She is marrying someone I love like an annoying brother, but I honestly think it will worsen the already rough situation they have. I wish she would run away and be the free spirit and bird that I know she is. She has lost who she is with each year they are together. 8 years + and they are now making the decision to get married. She has lost that fire and drive she once had. Now all she does is to make him happy. But I truly believe she isnt happy. and hasnt been for years. But why change what you have when you see no prospect of anything better, or rather are to lazy to look for it? It hurts me that I cant be this honest with her. But I support her in all she does. And I supprt her decision while I do not agree with it. Conflict of intertest, maybe. An internal battle not to scream at her to do better, you sure as hell better believe it!!! But what can I do but love and support her? I feel like I'm lying to her everytime we talk about it. I've told her I think she can do better for years ansd just let it go like three years ago and said she'll have to learn on her on. But I dont know what to say or do to make her see the light. I am so conflicted as you can see and read. I pray that she gets what she really wants and not what seems cool on the surface. Love is the greatest addiction, and I learned that by watching her. Too bad there isnt a rehab for it. She'd need all 12 steps, the entre library of books and go to group and one on one sessions 24-7 to get him out of her system. I used to wish he'd disappear for like a good 18 months in order for her to rediscover herself. So she can reprioritize her life, and realize she has missed so much waiting for him to catch up. I try to say it isnt my fight to be concerned this much about. But it is to a point. She is like blood and thats how i do with my family. I want to cry for her and with her, and show her this isnt it and that her life can and will go on. But she's having none of it, so we are here and have been for like 5 years. So where do we go from here?