Sleep finally came...

I wont claim to be the most religious person, I'd say I was more of a spritual person. I don't go to church as often as I should, I go but there are severe gaps in frequency.

Recently I've been finding my mind on more spritual things. I've wrestling with something for a few days, it was causing me to lose sleep. Only thing was I didn't know what it was. I still don't. But I was taught to believe in battles in the spirit world, spiritual warfare. The battle for your soul isn't always faught in the physical, that is my sincere belief. And for three days my body, mind and soul were uneasy. Kept finding myself deep in thought, but never about anything specific, jumping around to any and everything. I was unfocused and confused. I was drained and couldn't understand why. I wasn't worried about anything, not on the conscious level anyway.

But I prayed about it. Called my parents and they prayed about it. I got home and ate, relaxed for a moment or two. I retreated into my room and prayed some more. Opened my Bible, not to any particular place. I believe if you open it and just start to read you'll find what you were looking for. It opened on that page to serve a purpose for you. This is where mine opened:


Psalms 51
1 - Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.
2 - Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.
3 - For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin [is] ever before me.
4 - Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done [this] evil in thy sight: that thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, [and] be clear when thou judgest.
5 - Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.
6 - Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden [part] thou shalt make me to know wisdom.
7 - Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
8 - Make me to hear joy and gladness; [that] the bones [which] thou hast broken may rejoice.
9 - Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities.
10 - Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
11 - Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.
12 - Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me [with thy] free spirit.
13 - [Then] will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee.
14 - Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, thou God of my salvation: [and] my tongue shall sing aloud of thy righteousness.
15 - O Lord, open thou my lips; and my mouth shall shew forth thy praise.
16 - For thou desirest not sacrifice; else would I give [it]: thou delightest not in burnt offering.
17 - The sacrifices of God [are] a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.
18 - Do good in thy good pleasure unto Zion: build thou the walls of Jerusalem.
19 - Then shalt thou be pleased with the sacrifices of righteousness, with burnt offering and whole burnt offering: then shall they offer bullocks upon thine altar.

I listened to a few of my favorite Gospel joints, called my parents again and they prayed with me again. And I fell asleep. No issues, no jerking awake, no heart racing. Just sleep. I can say without question I feel sooooo much better this morning. My soul is at ease.

I guess with so much hussle and bussle in the world, sometimes you just have to return to the teaching. I was taught to pray at all times. But I guess my human arrogance and intellegence kept getting in the way. And sometimes we have to be broken in order to see that.