It's funny how warped our perception of what being in love feels like and looks like... what's worse is the many people who don't recognize it, and miss out on it...

I was one of those that thought being in love was like walking on cloud nine, a constant state of nirvana. I recognized the falling in love part, but missed the actual being in love part. I was still waiting to feel the utopia effect, and when I didn't, I thought it was all wrong. I didn't realize I was really in love until it was all taken away from me. I didn't know or recognize the feeling as being in love.

It took me 24 years to fall in love and when it finally happened I was unaware it had. I think that was the part the hurt the most. But then again it may be that I did recognize it subconsciously, and my fears took over and didn't allow me to make a conscious effort to keep it or an open mind to accept it.

But I've recognized and accepted it now...

I figured out I was in love because when I prayed about love, my mind immediately went to him right after "Amen". I was praying to find the man that God had in mind for me. For me to recognize him. And each prayer ended with him on my mind. When I would envision my future, he'd be my partner in it all. My future didn't look/feel right without him in it. It was frustrating and confusing. And all too hard to deal with. But I continued to pray and accept all that was being showed to me.


I know for me being love has opened me to so much. My mind is clearer, and my mind state has changed. I realized that inside there were parts of myself that I hadn't explored, parts of my emotions that hadn't been allowed to express themselves. But I know now how, why and when to do so.

It is a beautiful thing though. But not that TV in love crap...

I am in love... Blessings and Honor to God for allowing me to experience this feeling... A blessing it truly is to feel it, to see it, to recognize it in his eyes as well...